When God's Plan Doesn't Match Yours: Trusting Through Pregnancy Loss and Sleep Struggles
Hey friend! Have you ever found yourself wrestling with the gap between what you planned and what God allowed? Today I'm sharing my conversation with Jamie Ortiz, a military wife and pediatric sleep coach whose story will remind you that God's faithfulness shines brightest in our darkest moments. Whether you're walking through loss, facing unexpected challenges in motherhood, or simply needing encouragement that God sees you—this episode is a gentle reminder that His plan, though different from ours, is always good.
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🎧 Listen to the Episode
A Story of Loss, Faith, and Unexpected Purpose
Jamie's journey into motherhood began in Hawaii, where she and her military husband were stationed when they discovered they were expecting their first baby. But what should have been a time of joy quickly became a season of heartbreak when her water broke at just 22 weeks—two weeks before her baby's lungs would be developed enough for survival.
When Dreams Become Preparation
What strikes me most about Jamie's story is how God prepared her heart before the storm hit. Throughout her first pregnancy, she had recurring dreams about a little boy at different ages. She knew she was carrying a son, even though they hadn't found out the gender yet.
Even more remarkably, early in her pregnancy, Jamie was reading Scripture when a verse from 1 Samuel jumped off the page: "He is the Lord. Let him do what is good in his eyes" (1 Samuel 3:18). She wrote it down, put it on her mirror, and looked at it every day—having no idea how desperately she would need those words in the weeks to come.
Holding onto Hope in the Hospital
With her husband deployed to Korea, Jamie faced the unimaginable largely alone. When doctors suggested termination, her response was fierce and faith-filled: "I don't care if this baby has its arm growing out of his head. I'm keeping him."
Through weeks of hospitalization, blood clots that could have taken her life, and the heartbreaking reality that her son wouldn't survive, Jamie clung to that verse about trusting God's goodness. She describes her grief as supernatural—not questioning God's character even in the midst of devastating loss.
Her father prayed over their son. Her family surrounded them. And in that hospital room, they experienced both profound sorrow and sacred presence.
From Heartbreak to High-Risk: Subsequent Pregnancies
Jamie's story didn't end with loss. God blessed her and her husband with two beautiful children—Daniel (now 6) and their daughter (now 4)—but each pregnancy brought its own challenges:
Their Son's Dramatic Entrance
Another deployment: Her husband was stationed overseas again
Month-and-a-half hospitalization: Severe cervical thinning required extended bed rest
FaceTime delivery: Daniel was born premature while dad watched via video call
NICU stay: Two weeks in the hospital, but thankfully no breathing support needed
Their Daughter's Emergency Arrival
Eight months along: Made it further than the previous pregnancies
Emergency C-section: Required two blood transfusions
God's surprising gift: Despite trying to prevent another pregnancy, God had other plans
As Jamie beautifully puts it: "God had other plans because we did everything but abstinence to not have another one. And the Lord was like, 'Nah, you know, we're going to give you the girl.'"
Finding Purpose in the Pain: Becoming a Sleep Coach
Like many moms, Jamie found herself sleep-deprived and overwhelmed when her son was eight months old. But the expensive sleep training options weren't feasible for their military family budget. After successfully helping both her children develop healthy sleep habits, Jamie realized God was calling her to help other families navigate this challenging season.
Today, she's a certified pediatric sleep coach through Cradle Coach Academy, specializing in compassionate, personalized approaches that work for each family's unique situation.
Her Heart for Nursing Moms
One of Jamie's biggest encouragements for overwhelmed mamas is about bottle introduction. She's passionate about helping nursing mothers understand that offering one bottle feeding daily (once breastfeeding is established) isn't about replacing the beautiful bond of nursing—it's about:
Giving mom a break and preventing complete depletion
Allowing others to bond with baby through feeding
Protecting marriages by ensuring both parents can share nighttime responsibilities
Preventing feeding strikes that leave families stressed and baby hungry
As Jamie shares: "If baby's not sleeping, you're not sleeping. If you're not sleeping, you are not going to be as 100 percent of yourself as you want to be."
Faith Lessons from Jamie's Journey
God's Sovereignty Doesn't Diminish in Suffering
Jamie's story beautifully illustrates that God's goodness isn't dependent on our circumstances. Even when her plans crumbled, His character remained unchanged. That verse from 1 Samuel became her anchor: sometimes we don't understand God's ways, but we can always trust His heart.
Community Multiplies Comfort
Jamie's story has connected her with countless military spouses who've walked similar paths. As she puts it: "The amount of women that I've been able to actually [help]—military spouses specifically... there's like all these women in my face that are going through it, and I'm like, 'I mean, at least I know.' So it's not for nothing."
Purpose Often Emerges from Pain
What started as sleep deprivation and limited resources became Jamie's calling to serve other families. God used her struggles to birth a ministry that brings peace to exhausted parents and strengthens marriages.
📖 Scripture for Your Heart
"He is the Lord. Let him do what is good in his eyes."
— 1 Samuel 3:18
This was Jamie's lifeline verse—the words God gave her before she knew how desperately she'd need them. When we can't see the bigger picture, we can trust the One who holds it all.
🙏 A Prayer for Your Birth Journey
Father, for every mama listening who feels like her story isn't unfolding as planned—would You remind her of Your nearness? For those walking through loss, unexpected diagnoses, or simply the overwhelming demands of motherhood, help them remember that You see every tear, every worry, every sleepless night.
Give them Jamie's supernatural peace that doesn't question Your goodness even in pain. Help them find their community, their purpose, and their rest in You. May they experience Your faithfulness in ways that only come through walking difficult paths with You.
In Jesus' name, Amen.
📎 Resources & Links Mentioned
📸 Jamie's Instagram: @littleonessleepsociety
🌙 Pediatric sleep coaching for families with children up to age 6, including neurodivergent support: learn more at littleonessleepsociety.com
💖 Work with Me 1:1 – Doula Support & Coaching: Explore birth support and childbirth education for your pregnancy and birth journey
✨ Christian Mama Birth Prep Library; Free birth prep tools, worship playlist & more
📚 Childbirth Education Course – Learn the stages of labor, comfort measures, and labor positions
📣 Let’s Stay Connected
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Meet Your Host —
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📄 Full Episode Transcript
Natalie: Hey friend, and welcome back to Faith Over Fear, the Christian Pregnancy and Birth podcast. I'm so glad you're here with us today, and I'm joined today by Jamie Ortiz. She's a pediatric sleep coach, a military spouse and mama of two, with a special certification to support neurodivergent children up to age six. She's passionate about helping families find sleep solutions that are not just effective, but also compassionate and personalized.
Before we get into the work Jamie does as a sleep consultant, she's going to start by sharing her own powerful journey into motherhood, including the highs, the heartbreaks, and the ways God met her in each season. So Jamie, thank you so much for being here today. I know your motherhood journey kind of began in a heartbreaking way, but would you feel comfortable just sharing the story of your first pregnancy and just how the Lord met you in the midst of that loss?
Jamie: Yeah, so thank you first for having me. I'm so excited to be here. And you know, you really never know if your story resonates with somebody else who might, you know, another woman who's kind of going through it, right?
We were stationed in Hawaii at the time that I got pregnant with our firstborn. And my husband was set to deploy, so we decided to go back home, right? So you're not by yourself, you're around family. All of those fun things.
And the morning that I landed, later that night I thought—I honestly thought I peed myself. I was laughing so hard I thought I peed myself, which they say happens when you're pregnant. And my sister-in-law was like, "No, like that's too much." And then there was like no color in it, you know? So I was like, "Okay. My water broke." I was five months pregnant. I was about two weeks shy of when the lungs come in. And I can't remember what week that is. I think that's week 24. So I think I was like about 22 weeks at this point.
And so I get hospitalized. My husband calls me, he's like, "Hey, we just landed in Korea," which was where he was doing his deployment. And I said, "I literally just got to the hospital and my water broke." And you know, everything was going fine. They had a plan for me. They were like, you know, there was no fluid whatsoever. So there were of course concerns that baby wasn't going to develop the way the baby should develop.
The doctor was like—the baby, we didn't know the gender yet. I knew it was a boy. I definitely know that the reason why I had the dreams that I had was because God knew, right? So I knew it was going to be a boy. And then she wanted me to terminate and I thought she was absolutely insane. I said, "I don't care if this baby has its arm growing out of his head. Like I'm keeping him. How dare you?"
So they came up with a plan of, you know, bed rest. And then after about a week or so, they were going to release me and then bring me back to a different hospital that had like a stronger NICU, because they knew that I wasn't going to go full term. They just didn't know when. And so all that was into play.
And then the day that I was getting released to go back home, I was complaining about a pain, and I have two herniated discs. So I just thought, "Well, I've been in bed for about two weeks. It's my disc." But they checked me out anyway. And literally as a nurse was taking out my IV, they were like rushing in, like, "No, no, no. You have a blood clot, you have this, you have that." And it's like, "Okay." So I couldn't leave.
Now it becomes an emergency for my husband too, because at this point he wasn't set to come anyway. It was, we were just going to wait. And then if—if you guys know, if your spouse is deployed, anytime there's an emergency that requires them, you have to send a Red Cross message and it has to go through like all these people before it gets to him. Thankfully, he has his phone, so he knew everything in real time.
And so I stayed in the hospital and then it just got to the point where he just wasn't going to—he wasn't going to wait. But he didn't have his lungs yet. So at that point, my body gave birth. We knew he wasn't going to make it. My husband did make it literally 30 minutes before it was time to start pushing. And that was because my brother's in law enforcement. And so he picked him up and brought him like with the sirens on, and he made it.
And so, I mean, yeah, we knew he wasn't going to make it. My—it was my immediate family and my husband in the room. And it was depressing, as you could imagine. But it was also really great because my dad prayed over our son, he prayed over us. We were there as a family.
And then every pregnancy after that has been nothing but drama-filled and high risk, I mean, just everything. My husband was deployed for our—the son that we have now, and same thing, I had to be hospitalized for a month and a half, and then my water broke. Just a mess. And we have two children here, you know, on earth, a boy and a girl, six and four, and they keep me busy and I love them.
Natalie: Oh, Jamie, that is insane that that was your experience, especially not having your husband there, that you were navigating all of that.
Jamie: Yeah. I mean, they knew at that point—I think while he was—he had a layover in some state, and that's when we knew the baby's not going to make it. And so I didn't make that phone call. My dad handled that phone call. He's like, "Do you want to do it or do you want me?" And I said, "No, you do it. I don't want to do it." And so, you know, it was just like, it was crazy.
And at the same time, I saw God throughout. The beginning of that pregnancy always felt wrong. Something was—like I was bleeding the entire first trimester, which they say can happen, but it's very rare. Then, you know, I kept having dreams of this boy and different ages. Different ages, and I knew, I'm like, "I'm having a boy. Like I know it."
And then I remember I was early on pregnant and I was reading, I think it was First Kings or First Samuel—I always get them confused—but Eli knows his son isn't going to make it. And he says, "He is the Lord. Let him do what is good in his eyes." And for whatever reason that stuck with me and I wrote it down, I put it on my mirror. I looked at it every day. I had no idea that it was going to turn into what it turned out to be, but when I knew he wasn't going to make it, that's what I kept going to. Like, I just kept going back to that verse so that I wouldn't go insane.
Because as you could imagine, like, you know, so a lot of crying, of course, by myself. I would not—I didn't want to cry in front of my family. Even when my husband was in the shower, that's when I would cry. I would not cry in front of him. I mean—but when they were going to release me, had they released me because of that blood clot, I would have probably died in my sleep at this point if we're honest, because I feel like everybody dies in their sleep from a blood clot instead of having it do its thing when you're awake. So yeah, it was pretty crazy.
Natalie: But I mean, what a powerful thing that the Lord was going before you—and just showing you his heart and his character ahead of everything else that was going to unfold because the Lord knew—
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: —and for whatever reason that's what he had decided your story would be. But I mean, how beautiful that he was so close to you during that time. It's so sad to think that you were, you know, just having to grieve kind of in silence, but that you did have the Lord there with you to navigate all of the emotions that would go along with a loss like that.
Jamie: Yeah. And I felt all the emotions. I didn't feel anger and I didn't question Him either. Which I think some women, when they do it, they struggle. And I think that's natural. Like, I think that I was not natural in that moment. Like it was supernatural that I didn't go to that side where like I wasn't mad or I wasn't questioning him. It was like, well, I don't know why he did it, but I mean, who am I? Do you know what I mean? I just left the grief to be private because that's just how I am. But—
Natalie: Yeah. Yeah. And we all grieve so differently.
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: And then you had a somewhat complicated second pregnancy. Do you mind kind of sharing what all happened in that pregnancy and birth experience?
Jamie: Yeah, so with him, his name's Daniel. My husband again was getting ready to deploy. I don't remember if it was back to—I think it was Korea or Poland. Poland. And same thing. I'm getting ready, you know, we're getting things ready. They found out that I had a septate uterus, so I had surgery, which is why my water broke so early with our firstborn. They figured that out. So that was—then they kept monitoring me as high risk.
And then literally the day before we were supposed to leave Texas to go back home because I was going to go back home because he was deploying, they were like, "Oh my gosh, you almost have no cervix. Your cervix has thinned out so much." And I'm like, "We've literally been here every week and it's been fine." So then now I'm freaking out. Like, I didn't know what that meant because that wasn't the issue the first time. So I'm like, "Okay, what does that mean?" And, you know, they explained everything.
So they opened the OR so that I could have surgery on that Saturday. Made sure that, you know, I was fine to travel because I can't fly at this point as a pregnant person with a history of DVT. And then so we drove. Then my husband drives back to Texas. And I think at my first high risk appointment, the doctor was like, "No girl. Your cervix is still extra thin than the last time. My advice is you—at least you get hospitalized. Put you on bed rest, monitor you." I was there for a month and a half.
Had to cancel everything that I had for my baby shower, move it over to the hospital, which was so—it was great. It was cute, you know. Actually loved my experience there. Me and my mom joke around all the time that it was a hotel stay because I got garden privileges, which is nice because some of these women were—they were also on bed rest, but they couldn't even get out of the room. Like, I could at least go downstairs, I could go outside. So I'm like, you know, it ended up being great.
But then they—I go back home and I think like a week later, my water broke. I was seven months pregnant at this time. So my husband was not there for the birth. He was there via FaceTime. Thank God that there is technology. And then my body does not take to epidural, so I felt—they gave me, I think three times the epidural and my body was like, "No girl, we're not doing this." So I felt everything, you know, ripped from front to back, felt all of that when they were sewing me back up. I mean, it was awful.
But they were prepared for him. So he had, you know, they gave him the steroid shots. So he was completely healthy. I mean, he just—he was in the NICU for like two weeks. He didn't need help breathing. So that's great, because you know, some babies, most of the babies in the NICU, they need that support. He didn't need that support. He was a massive preemie.
And then with my daughter, she's—she got to eight months, I was eight months with her. The only thing with her was that she ended up being emergency C-section. I needed two blood transfusions. And I mean, it's just not—I mean, listen, even after my son, I was ready to just be done being pregnant, like my body does not do well. But God had other plans because we did everything but abstinence to not have another one. And the Lord was like, "Nah, you know, we're going to give you the girl." And she is like, she's so funny. I love her so much. She's my wild child.
Natalie: I didn't realize your son was also named Daniel. That's my son's name.
Jamie: Oh yeah. I love that name. It's such a good, strong name. Yeah.
Natalie: The best. And he's named after my dad, Daniel. But I also just love Daniel in the Bible—
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: —you know, he was a man who was in the world, but not of the world.
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: I wanted to—I mean, I pray that over both of my kids, but that was one of the biggest reasons why I named him that, because I just love Daniel in the Bible.
Jamie: Yes. Yeah.
Natalie: Yeah. And I have one of each too, so I get it. The girl and the boy. Well then how did you become a sleep consultant? Did that kind of start after your very wild birth experiences? How did the Lord kind of draw you into that line of work?
Jamie: So, I mean, for most it's the same. You're sleep deprived and you're like, "What are we going to do?" And I started researching for my son when he was eight months old, but it was so crazy expensive and I'm like, "I'm sorry, I don't have $800 to give," you know. So we did the old school like, "Well, you just cry and you'll be all right. Like, all your needs are met. No baby has ever passed away from crying. We all went through it. Our relationships with our parents are great," you know, so let's do it. He was on a schedule, so he didn't even cry. He just needed his own space.
And so for my daughter, I was like, "Okay, we're going to do this differently." And so after her, that's when I was like, "Okay, I'm going to actually do this because parents need to know, like it's not just one thing, there's different ways of going about it." And so then I got certified through the Cradle Coach Academy and I mean, I haven't looked back since and it's been almost four years now.
Natalie: That's so cool. Yeah, there's no one size fits all approach to sleep training. And I will recommend, you know, certain courses and things and, you know, now that we've connected, I recommend clients to you, but I think there is a lot of misconception about sleep training—that it only looks one way or that it's just like, you're not responsive to your kids, or that it's too schedule oriented or, you know, it is just—it's not personalized. So for, you know, mamas who are listening to this that want to explore quote unquote sleep training, what encouragement could you give to them about what that might look like or what that even looks like with your practice?
Jamie: So the first thing I would say is think about what are your end goals and how do you want to get there, right? Because sometimes families, they don't have a lot of time. I've worked with a family where they were both doctors. They did not have time to do the most gentle approach, because I'm very honest. I said, "This can work, but you're going to be doing this for a few weeks. So do you want faster results or are you okay?" So think about how fast do you want to get there?
And the other thing is to also remember that yes, any consultant should try and make the parents comfortable. Sometimes what makes them comfortable is not what the baby needs. Like it will not fit the baby's temperament. Now, when we say temperament, we're talking babies eight months up. Younger than that, I mean, it's a whole different ballgame in my opinion. But being very realistic about what you're okay with, what you're not okay with. Let the person you speak with who's going to be in charge of coming up with your sleep plan know, "These are—this is what I'm okay with. This is not what I'm okay with. I'm okay with meeting in the middle," that type of thing.
And so I like to ask the same. I ask questions when I'm having a consultation with a family, I say, "What questions do you have for me?" And then I will let them know I'm okay with meeting in the middle and changing things up as long as it has progress forward, whatever that looks like. And sometimes it looks like a combination of different methods. And do you want to be on a schedule? Do you not want a schedule? Okay, great, then let's work with this. Let's do this. And I think it's just communication, it's teamwork. Parents have to be honest throughout the process with the sleep consultant, because we're seeing it from like, I want to get you from point A to point B. I'm not emotionally invested, right? But I'm thinking of it more logically. Let me get you guys to your goal. So if there's something that you feel is not right, you need to let me know. Or whatever sleep consultant you're working with.
Natalie: Yeah, I can totally see that because you do have to do some soul searching when you are, especially a first time parent—
Jamie: Mm-hmm.
Natalie: —there's this idea of like, "Oh, when I'm a parent, I'm going to do this, or I'll never do that." And then you actually become a parent and it changes the game, where the things that you thought you would want to do, you don't want to do, and the things you said you would never do—
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: —you're doing them.
Jamie: Right.
Natalie: And that's not to say like, "Oh, you don't know yourself or whatever." But I'm just saying when you're in it—
Jamie: Mm-hmm.
Natalie: —it can kind of change based on your circumstances and your situations. And then also having subsequent children where they have a totally different temperament than the first, then you have to relearn all of the things and be fine with pivoting the approach that you had the first time. I know that's what we went through where Ellie was a fantastic sleeper. And we did Taking Cara Babies Sleep Course and it was a phenomenal course because Ellie was such an easy sleeper. And then Daniel, we did not have that luxury of being able to just stay strict to like the rhythms and the schedules and all the things like we did with Ellie. So Daniel just didn't have that type of smooth sleep, you know, he just—it took more time for him and he's a great sleeper now, but I mean, it took over a year.
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: Whereas with Ellie, five and a half months, she was like sleep trained—
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: —sleeping 12 hours through the night. And so, yeah, it's just different. And it's so important to just have that grace for yourself as you're learning all this whole other side of parenting.
Jamie: Even with your own kids, if you're on kid two, kid three or anything after your first child, even if you were to sleep train them at the same age you did the first one, there's no guarantee that what you did the first time around is going to work the second time around because they're so different. So, you know, that's—I think that's why I always love working—I have a few families that I've worked with who are on kid two or three, and they're like, "We don't even want to attempt on our own. We already know who we're going to go with. And she knows us already." I know what to present them with. I know their style. And it just makes it a lot easier and it makes it feel like more like your friend really, when you've already kind of connected in that way. So I love it.
Natalie: I love that. For the tired mamas listening who feel like they've tried everything, but nothing seems to be working, is there a simple mindset shift or something that you could encourage them to take away from your expertise?
Jamie: I would say, I actually want to speak to the nursing mom because every family that I work with, when there is nursing, that is a big association that babies have naturally, right. As a sleep consultant, we're not going in to say, "You're never nursing your baby. You're not doing—we're not doing that." But I will say, I highly encourage, once your milk is established, once you know everything's going smooth, introduce the bottle for at least one feeding.
Number one, that is going to give you a break. Number two, it gives somebody else a chance to connect with your baby, but also if at any point you are not available to feed your baby, they understand how to take a bottle because I finished up with a family recently and she would leave work to come nurse and then go back to work because baby refused from anybody else. And then we started working on sleep training and he was taking it from dad, the nanny, I mean, just huge changes and more because of what it did for her mental psyche. Because I think sometimes we're so in baby mode, we forget, "Okay, well how is this affecting me?" Because now I feel like I'm just nonstop, nonstop as a feeder, which okay, you know, baby needs you to feed. Of course. But then also, what is it doing to your spouse? They're looking at you depleting because you're doing so much. Maybe you're not even sleeping in the same room, because I've worked with families that they have not slept in the same room since baby was born, right?
So be honest with your spouse. Where are you at? What is it that your spouse wants? Some husbands are afraid to be honest with their wives because they don't want to hurt them. But be honest with each other. Offer at least one bottle once that milk and everything has been established. And then think about what is your goal at the end of the day when baby is however old. What do you want sleep to look like for you and for this baby? Because if baby's not sleeping, you're not sleeping. If you're not sleeping, you are not going to be as 100 percent of yourself as you want to be.
Natalie: I love that you say that because we definitely struggled with that whole bottle situation.
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: With Ellie where we did not introduce a bottle until she was well past—I want to say, like, I know you're supposed to try and introduce it between three to six weeks when breastfeeding is well established, whatever that means for the mom and the baby.
Jamie: I mean some families, it really is closer to that six week mark.
Natalie: Mm-hmm. We were well past that. And so we kind of missed that window of opportunity to try to introduce the bottle to her. And by the time we did, she absolutely refused the bottle. She only wanted the breast. And that made me so stressed out. There was like an instance when she was maybe eight weeks old, and I had a dentist appointment and I had to leave her and left her here with Brian. And then Brian calls me like on the verge of tears because she's not taking the bottle that we, you know, have been trying to give her. And it was just, it was so stressful. Just, I mean, little things like going to the dentist became this whole ordeal because we didn't have that, you know, that foresight to, "Okay, let—this is a good idea, even if this isn't a super regular thing, but just with some regularity, a couple bottles a week having dad or, you know, nanny or somebody else, grandparent give the bottle." Usually it's, you know, helpful for mom to even not be in the room or sometimes even in the house if that baby is very much preferring to only nurse. But that does—it establishes such a healthy dynamic in the family to where mom doesn't feel like the feeding responsibility—only it, you know, it can only be her and then dad and other family and friends and sitters can be involved with the care.
Jamie: So mom and dad can step away separately.
Natalie: Right.
Jamie: You know, eventually for dates and seeing friends and down the line going on a trip. You know—
Natalie: Yeah.
Jamie: —it's so helpful and I was so grateful for that experience to just be able to kind of know the mindset behind that. And it was truly just a place for me with Ellie, where I just wanted to love my baby girl by just nursing her and all the things. But I neglected that other half of, "But this also puts all of us at a disadvantage."
Natalie: Right.
Jamie: And so it is important to do that. So I'm glad you brought that up because that is a huge part. And then, you know, the sharing that responsibility in the night so that mom can actually sleep with a child.
Natalie: Like I said, Ellie was a good sleeper and so that was the other kind of—it was like a, you know, double-edged sword there where she was a good sleeper and so it wasn't like an issue for me to nurse her because she would usually go right back down to sleep.
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: But yeah, if you're a mom, if nursing your baby who just will not go back to sleep or really has an issue sleeping after nursing in the night—
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: —help is vital for your functioning.
Jamie: Oh my gosh. Exactly. I mean, it's not even just like, "Oh, I feel rested and have energy." It's like, no, it actually—if you are sleep deprived, it affects everything in your body, so like, it's more than, "Oh, let me just sleep train, because, you know, nobody's sleeping." I do it honestly more because of the couples that I work with. Like, I'm here for your marriage and if your husband is sleeping or you are sleeping in separate rooms for going on six, seven months, I'm not okay with that. I can guarantee your spouse isn't okay with it. He just doesn't know how to tell you because we're protective over our babies. Right. So, you know, I always say like, we need to think about all those things so that nobody gets forgotten in the mix of, while we're trying to figure out what does motherhood look like, because it is—you kind of get lost in it, especially your first time around because you don't know what you're doing and you want to be the best that you can be.
And actually the other thing is, I would say really more towards like month three of your baby being born, aim to at least put them down for a nap in their own sleep space at least once per day. Get them used to what is going to be where they are going to end up eventually. Co-sleeping is a real thing. Most of the babies that I work with is because they're co-sleeping and they don't know how to kind of gently find ways to get them to their own space. So, you know, aim at least one nap after baby is three months old or at three months and get them used to their spot.
Natalie: I love that. Well, thank you, Jamie, so much for sharing your personal stories and your incredible expertise. If a family wants to connect with you to learn more about sleep consulting and ways that you can serve them in that way, how can people get ahold of you?
Jamie: You can find me on Instagram under @littleonessleepsociety, or on my website, littleonessleepsociety.com.
Natalie: Wonderful. And I'll have all of that in the show notes as well. But thank you so much again. You are a delight, and I just loved hearing your wild stories. It is not about perfection in motherhood. It is not about things going exactly to the plan that you wanted for your birth, your motherhood journey, your sleep journey. Truly it is up to the Lord and in his sovereignty to have everything pan out the way that he has called it to and when we—like what you did, where you just have time to meditate on that and to really just trust the Lord, not just in theory, but as it's happening. Trusting him with the outcome, knowing that he is in control, even when it seems out of control, even if the outcome that happens was the literal last thing you wanted he's still good.
Jamie: Oh gosh, I'll talk about Him anytime. And the amount of women that I've been able to actually—military spouses specifically, I've gone through. So they're almost the same type of story, and I'm like, "I've never had that happen before, and now all of a sudden it happens to me and there's like all these women in my face that are going through it," and I'm like, "I mean, at least I know." So it's not for nothing. Do you know what I mean? So—
Natalie: And you're so right. I feel like the more we share our stories, the more other women come out of the woodwork and they're like, "That happened to me too. Or that happened to somebody close that I love." And it just brings us all together especially as sisters in Christ where we get to just band together and be like, you know what, this situation sucks.
Jamie: Yes.
Natalie: I have some friends and you know, clients right now walking through some very, very hard stuff. But you know, when we bring other women into this experience, we get to love and encourage each other in a way that's like filled with truth. It is not "I hope things work out" or "I hope everything is okay," but knowing—
Jamie: Yeah.
Natalie: —the Lord truly is working all things for our good and his glory always in everything and we get to rest in that truth uniquely, as those that love and follow Jesus.
Jamie: Yeah, absolutely.
Natalie: I appreciate you.
Jamie: Thank you. I appreciate it.
